For Granny

I wrote this one Feb 2, 1998. It was right after we found out about her cancer.

One lonely warrior with a crown of gray
Has taken the time to go to the alter and pray
With uplifted hands and a heavenly face
She stands alone, praying for grace
Some children have left, grand children too
She prays with a fervency they never knew
A mothers love, a granmother heart,
but her faith in God is my favorite part.
As other warriors she could go away
But this heavenly warrior knows she must stay
The war she is fighting is not flesh and blood
It is a war to be won, only with love,
Feb 2nd, sitting in a pew
Thinking of all the things I could do
A quiet service, she rose to pray
God used her in a special way
She walked to the front, hands held high
A shout of victory, Her battle CryI
n the alter She started to pace
Silent tears tracing her face
The church that was silent, soon came alive
By the prayers of a warrior to stable to die.


I wrote this one the day I found out she had cancer.

Alone, in the rain, with my misery.
The drops fallin on my windshieldare so unlike my tears that refuse to fall
I heard that word again, the one I hate so much
The DJ he said it was just a statistic
But cancer is no longer a statistic,
I love her SO
It pulled that string, the cord that rips my heart in two
He says there is hope,
but I see no hope
They say I am taking this way to hard
What do they know about the way I feel?
They Say I love to much,
What is love if it is not your all
God help me I cannot go on!
Why can't I stop the pain, that she must face alone?
I cannot pray for mercy,
Oh god where is your Grace?
I've heard death has no sting
The grave no victory!
But if she should die, I could not take the pain
I know God loves her as much as I
SO why can't he stop the tears I cannot cry?

And then we were given a precious gift. Healing. More precious precious years to spend with her. And then it was taken from us. And once again I felt my heart break, but I made her a promise. It is a promise that I am having a hard hard time keeping, but It is a promise to my Granny....
And when you are gone,
You will live on
In everything I find neat
In every friend I greet
In every stranger I meet
In my every heartbeat
But my soul will cry
Tears that do not dry
Some days life will pass me by
I will ask why
But when You are gone
I will live on.

So tonight I sit and cry. Wishing with all my heart for one more phone call. For one more Sam can you help me. For one more moment with the wonderful woman that I love so much. I know without a shadow of a doubt that she loved me. She loved me more than anything in this world, I cling to that thought. I cling to that love and I know that because of her love I am the person I am today. Because she believed in me, I am a special person. I'm not saying I am perfect or that she can take all the credit for who I am. My parent, my sister, my ex and his family, my friends and my daughter have all helped to shape me into what I am, but she is a big big part of my life. I love her. I miss her. And someday I will see her again. And just for the record, I am the favorite. No matter what the other ones say!

I sat around and listened to 8 kids the other day.
I marveled and amazed at what they had to say.
My name is Karen, I've been around so long,
I am the favorite grandchild to think otherwise would be wrong.
The second I heard him say, My name is Dwayne,
Iam the favorite grandchild. I hold current reign
The third I heard her say, "My name is Sam."
I am the favorite grandchild just because I am.
The fourth He said my name is Ja
I am the favorite grandchild cause Papa blest me that day
The fifth said my name is De
I am the favorite grandchild because my blood runs through thee
The sixth he said with a big big grin.
I am the favorite grandchild my name is Ben
The seventh she said I am Sarahann wrap
I am the favorite grandchild, your all full of crap.
The 8th she said, I'm Becca Boo
I am the real favorite, who the heck are you?
What a special woman to make 8 kids all feel this way.
That is why I marvel and amaze at what they had to say..............